Pigeon English by David Cook

Pigeon English was originally published in A Box of Stars Beneath The Bed: The 2016 National Flash Fiction Anthology

Dom entered the shabby bus station and walked past a shabby pigeon, which said ‘Alright, mate?’

He stopped dead, looked at the bird, then away, then back again. ‘Did you just say something?’ he asked.

‘Course not mate, I’m a bloody pigeon,’ said the pigeon.

‘Bugger me, a talking pigeon,’ exclaimed Dom.

‘Read my beak,’ said the pigeon. ‘I am not a talking pigeon. Coo, bloody coo, OK?’

‘No, no, you’re speaking now,’ said Dom. ‘I heard it.’

‘Nah, mate. You’re cracking up, that’s what it is. Voices in the head and that, innit. I’d see a doctor, if I were you.’

‘What? No, you’re bloody well talking!’

‘Am not! You ask that lot.’

Dom turned to the small crowd at the bus station, who looked away simultaneously while being absolutely sure to keep staring, which is quite a skill when you think about it.

‘You heard it, right?’ he demanded. ‘That pigeon spoke!’

The crowd avoided eye contact. A few people shook their heads and mumbled.

‘See mate,’ said the pigeon. ‘You’ve gone round the twist. Loco in the coconut. Nuts in the nut. Check yerself into a clinic, that’s my advice.’

Dom looked around desperately. The crowd were all taking a tremendous interest in the timetable for the number 42.

Then a small voice piped up nearby. ‘I heard him talking, mister!’ it said.

Dom wheeled round in joy. He wasn’t going mad after all.

‘A talking pigeon, who’d ever of thought it?’ said the rat by his foot.

Grab a Ticket

To help raise money – ensuring that we can continue to do what we do, helping new and emerging writers – we’re raffling off a copy of the recent Women’s Prize for Fiction winner: Hamnet by Maggie O’Farrell

Tickets are just 50p, and the raffle ends either when all tickets are sold, or on Sunday 27th September.

About The Author

David Cook’s stories have been published in the National Flash Fiction Anthology, Spelk, Ellipsis Zine, the Sunlight Press and many more. He’s a Pushcart Prize and Best of the Net Nominee and was shortlisted for the Wigleaf Top 50 Flash Fictions 2020. He lives in Bridgend, Wales, with his wife and daughter.

Bandit Fiction is an entirely not-for-profit organisation ran by passionate volunteers. We do our best to keep costs low, but we rely on the support of our readers and followers to be able to do what we do. The best way to support us is by purchasing one of our back issues. All issues are ‘pay what you want’, and all money goes directly towards paying operational costs.

5 responses

  1. Hibah Shabkhez

    Oddly relatable, this.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pigeon English | DAVE COOK, WRITER

    […] A story about a talking pigeon, up at Bandit Fiction. […]


  3. Mike Fall

    Best wishes,



  4. Sandra B Julian

    Lovely fun read, and so real. Where’s the LOVE button?


  5. Jason Youngman

    Good job


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: